Often
one comes across some weird or weird sounding recipes. Whenever I come
across one I will place it on this page! Some are real recipes, other just
tongue in cheek, it's for you to decide!
My friend, Carmen from
North Pole, Alaska, wrote to say that they don't have elephants over there,
but she sent me this Moose Stew recipe instead:
MOOSE STEW
Makes (enough to feed an entire village)
Instructions:
Add 20 gallons of water to a clean 55-gallon empty oil drum (oil drums can
be found in most Alaska backyards or frontyards - especially if the owner
is a trucker).
Dump in one medium sized moose, cut into bite-sized pieces (this will take
you approximately 2 weeks if you do it alone so be sure you keep your meat
cold)
Add:
15 pounds of potatoes, quartered
4 large handfuls of spruce needles
5 Alaskan cabbage heads, diced (these have to be at least 22
pounds each).
10 Pounds of carrots (split)
8 large onions (about 2 pounds each) chopped
Add 3 quarts of moose milk (available from a lactating moose)
Should take about 3 months to get the amount needed,, so be sure you
freeze what you get each day to keep it fresh.
Salt and Pepper to taste
Cook outside over a birch-wood fire for at least one week, but preferably
10 days
Stir every hour (or whenever you think about it) with a long birch pole.
If more people arrive than expected, add three to four rabbits but
remember that most people don't like hare in their stew.
WARNING: Use care when bending over to dip stew out of bottom of the
55-gallon drum as there have been a few reported cases of people falling
in.
(...and if
you don't like elephant or moose, try crocodile!..Peter)
Sue van Strijp-Crear, Redhouse,
Port Elizabeth
Had a good laugh at
the comments and suggestions. However, as can be seen from the below
Crocodile recipe, the best way to cook your elephants is in a heated pool
- just don't forget to take the chlorinated water out - also, if you don't
have one, make sure your neighbour that does, does not mind you utilising
it - make sure they are also invited to the feast.
However, I see that you do not have the fabulous recipe for Crocodile
Curry-one that went down extremely well while living in the Free State
(RSA). Extremely cold winters so the warmth of the curry was right on. As
you will see from below - there are lots of extra's that will come out of
the preparation - like gifts, jewellery and additional spin-off meals.
Crocodile Curry
PERSONNEL:
1 Indian Chef; plus
8 Kitchen assistants
4 Spare assistants on standby
INGREDIENTS:
3 Large Crocs (C. Niloticus)
1 Smoked warthog
3000 Green peppers
1-4kgs of Curry Powder (depending on how hot you like it) I personally
like the 'Mother-in-Law's tongue" brand
1/2 ton rice
1 Tree of Bay Leaves
PREPARATION:
1. Beat crocs over the heads with a sledgehammer.
2. Collect tears in 44 gallon drums and use them for salad dressing.
3. Indian chef tells assistants to place crocs into heated swimming
pool. Turn on the steam. Make sure that the crocs area quite dead -
otherwise spare assistants might be required.
4. Boil for 10 days. After 7 days, skin can be pulled off - which is
used for handbags etc. Nice keepsake for the invited guests. During the
10th day the teeth will fall out and are used for jewellery and amulet's.
5. Cut off tail and use for Crock-tail soup at a later stage - keep in
deepfreeze once cooled off.
6. Surviving assistants then must cut crocs into bite size cubes.
7. Add remaining ingredients and allow to simmer for a further 2 days.
Taste to see if it has enough spices etc. I sometimes like to add
apricot jam to give it extra juiciness and flavour - about 5 kgs or to
taste should do.
8. Curry should be ready when the vultures start circling above.
Serves approximately 1250 people.
PS - Let your mother-in-law try it out first
...and
how about this one, also from Carmen in North Pole, Alaska
Moose Poop
Cookies
Ingredients:
2 sticks of butter
3/4 cup brown sugar
3/4 cup white sugar
2 eggs
1 tsp vanilla (5cc)
2 cups flour (about 450 grams)
1/2 tsp salt (2.5mg)
1 tsp baking soda (5mg)
3 cups oatmeal (about 720 grams)
1 cup chopped walnuts (about 225 grams, may
be a tad more)
2 cups chocolate chips (about 450 grams)
Instructions:
Mix all together, drop by 1/4 cup portions on a greased cookie sheet. Bake
at 325 degrees for 20 minutes. (I don't remember what 325 degrees is on
S.A. or other ovens)
*It's the best cookie you will ever eat! *
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