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June 30th, 2013



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South African Folk-lore tales

In South Africa we love the outdoors and camping and a very special time is sitting around the campfire in the evenings and telling stories. I recently came upon a book titled Outa Karel's Stories. Over the next few letters I will be featuring tales from this book which was published in 1914 and written by Sannie Metelerkamp. I will start off with the foreword and introduction before getting to the actual stories.


Here are two more stories, previous stories can be found here.

The Little Red Tortoise.

“No Jakhals story to-night, please, Outa,” said little Jan, as they gathered round the

fire. “We all think Jakhals was a cruel horrid creature, eating the poor little Doves and

cracking the good Heron’s neck.”

“Yes,” chimed in Pietie, “he was always playing wicked tricks, so no more Jakhals

for us. What will you tell us to-night, Outa?”

“Something really nice,” suggested Willem, “and not unkind.”

Outa’s beady black eyes twinkled from one to another of his little masters, while an

affectionate smile spread over his yellow face, accentuating the wrinkles which crisscrossed

it in every direction.

“Ach! the soft young hearts! Outa’s heart was like that once, too, but”—he shook his

head—“if the heart doesn’t get a little taai like a biltong, it is of no use to a person in

this old hard world.” He deposited his shapeless hat on the floor, tapped his red

kopdoek with a clawlike forefinger, and waited for an inspiration. It came from an

unexpected quarter, for suddenly there was a commotion at the end of his old coat,

the tails of which hung down nearly to the floor, and, diving into his pocket, the old

man triumphantly produced a squirming tortoise.

“See what Outa caught for the baasjes near the Klip Kop this afternoon—a nice little

berg schilpad.1 Now Baas Willem can put it in his kraal with the others and let it lay

eggs. It is still young, but it will grow—yes, so big.” A cart-wheel might have been

comfortably contained in the circle described by Outa’s arms.

It was a knobbly, darkly-marked tortoise, quite unlike those the little boys generally

found in the veld near the house, and they took possession of it with delight and

suggestions as to a name. After discussion, honours were equally in favour of “Piet

Retief” and “Mrs. Van Riebeeck,” and it was decided that the casting vote should be

left to Cousin Minnie, the children’s governess.

For a long time they had kept tortoises of all sorts and sizes in their schilpad-kraal,

and so tame and intelligent had some of these creatures grown that they would come

when called, and big old “Woltemade” roamed about at will, often disappearing for a

time, and returning to his companions after a few days in the veld.

Outa turned the new acquisition on its back on the jackalskin rug, where it lay

wriggling and going through the strangest contortions. “Ach! the wise little man. Is it

there its mother sprinkled it with buchu,2 there, just under its arm?” He touched the

skinny under-side of one of its forelegs. “Here, Baas Willem, put it in the soap-boxie

till to-morrow. Ach! if only it had been a red tortoise, how glad Outa would have


“A red tortoise!” echoed Pietie and little Jan, while Willem hurried back from the

passage to hear all about it.

“And have the baasjes then never heard of a red tortoise? Yes, certainly, sometimes a

red one is born, but not often—only once in a thousand years; and when this happens

the news is sent round, because it is such a wonderful thing; and the whole nation of

Schilpads—those frogs with bony shields and hard beaks—are glad because they

know the little red one has come to help them against their enemies.

“Once a long, long time ago a mother Schilpad laid an egg in a shallow hole in the

sand, just where the sun could warm it all the day, and she scraped a little sand over

it, so that no one could see it. See baasjes, she was afraid of thieves. It was white and

round, and so large that she felt very proud of it, and she often went to see how it was

getting on. One day, as she got near the place she heard a little voice: ‘Peep! Peep!

Mam-ma, mam-ma, come and find me.’

“So she called out, ‘Kindje, kindje, here’s your mam-ma.’ My! but she walked fast!

Her short legs just went so”—Outa’s arms worked vigorously—“and when she got to

the karroo-bush where she had put the egg the shell was broken and a little Red

Tortoise was sitting alongside of it!

“His shell was soft, and you could see everything inside of him, and how the blood

went this way and that way: but never mind, it is maar so with little tortoises. He was

fine and healthy, and everything about him was quite red. Alle wereld! old Mam-ma

was proud! She went and told all her friends, and they came from all sides to see the

little Red Tortoise. There were berg tortoises, and vlakte tortoises, and zand-kruipers,

and even water tortoises, young and old, and they all sat round and praised him and

gave him good advice and nice things to eat.

“He listened to everything and ate all the nice things, and grew bigger and redder and

harder, but he didn’t talk much, and the Old Ones nodded to each other and said,

‘Ach, but he is sensible!’ But the Young Ones said, ‘Ach, but he is stuck-up!’ and

they went away and crawled in the red clay to make themselves red. But it was no

good. In a little while it all rubbed off.

“At last all the visitor Schilpads went home again. But the little Red Tortoise stayed

with his Mam-ma, and went on growing bigger and redder and harder, and his Mamma

was toch so proud of him!

“When he walked in the veld and the other young tortoises said to him, ‘Come, we’ll

show you the way to do things; you must do so, and you must do so,’ he said, ‘You

can do so if you like, but I’ll do things my own way!’ And they said ‘Stuck-up Red

Thing! Wait, Oubaas Giraffe will get you!’ But they left him alone, and although they

all wished they were red, they did not crawl in the clay any more: they knew it was no

good. It was only from outside, so it soon rubbed off, but the little Red One’s redness

was from inside; and baasjes know, for a thing to be any good it must be on the

inside.” He glanced involuntarily at the wall-cupboard where his soopje was safely

locked up: it would certainly not be any good, in his opinion, till it was on the inside

of him.

“But when the Old Tortoises gave him advice, the little Red Tortoise listened and

thanked them. He was a wise little man. He knew when to speak and when to hold his


“At that time, my baasjes, the whole Tortoise nation was having a hard time with

Oubaas Giraffe—that old horse with the long neck and the unequal legs, who is all

white and black like a burnt thornbush3 with crows sitting on it. He gives blue ashes

when he is burnt, therefore is he called the Blue One.

“He had taken to eating tortoises. They didn’t know what to do. They tried to make a

plan, but no! they could find no remedy. Whenever Oubaas Giraffe saw a nice young

tortoise that he could easily swallow, he picked it up in his mouth, and from fright it

pulled its head and all its feet into its shell, and—goops!—one swallow and it had

sailed down the Blue One’s long throat, just like baasjes sail down the plank at the

side of the skeer-kraal.

“The little Red Tortoise listened to the plans that were made, and at last he thought of

a plan. He was not sure how it would go, but he was a brave little one, and he thought

by himself, ‘If it goes wrong, there will be no more little Red Tortoise: but if it goes

right, then the whole Tortoise nation will be able to live again.’

“So what did he do, my baasjes? He crawled out far in the veld and sat in the path

where the Old Blue One liked to walk. Soon he heard goof, goof, goof, coming nearer

and nearer. Then the noise stopped. The little Red One peeped from under his shell.

Yes, there was the great Blue One, standing over him and looking very fierce.

“Do you know, little Red Tortoise, in one moment I could trample you to death?’

“The little Red One was very frightened, for this was not his plan, but he said


“‘Do you know, little Red Tortoise, in one moment I could swallow you?’

“‘Do you know, little Red Tortoise, in one moment I could swallow you.’”

“Ach! how glad was the little Red Tortoise! But he only said in a small little voice,

‘Yes, noble Blue One, I belong to the nation whom it is the custom to swallow. Please

swallow me!’

“Oubaas Giraffe picked him up and gave a little gulp, and the little Red Tortoise

slipped half-way down his long throat. But ojé! here a strange thing happened. The

little Red One would go no further. Instead of drawing in his head and legs and

slipping down like a stone, like all the other tortoises had done, he wanted to see

where he was going, so he stuck out his head, and fastened his sharp little nails into

Oubaas Giraffe’s gullet, and there he hung like a bat on a wall.

“‘Go down, go down, little Tortoise! You choke me!’ The Old Blue One could hardly

speak; his throat was so full of tortoise.

“‘Peep! peep!’ said the little Red One, and held on more tightly than ever.

“‘Come up, come up, little Tortoise! You kill me!’ The Old Blue One was stamping

and gurgling now.

“‘Peep! peep!’ said the little Red One, and hung on with his hard bent beak as well.

He thought, ‘No! too many of my nation have sailed down this red sloot. I won’t let


“I tell you, baasjes, Oubaas Giraffe danced and pranced over the veld; he screamed

and bellowed; he gurgled and swallowed; he tried to get the little Red Tortoise down,

and he tried to get him up; but it was no use. The little Red One clung fast to him till

he was quite choked, and sank down in the sand and died.

“Then the little Red Tortoise crawled out, and went home to tell his Mam-ma that he

had killed Oubaas Giraffe and that his nation could have peace again. Ach! but she

was proud of him!

“‘It’s not for nothing you were born red,’ she said. ‘Come here, my little Crab, that I

may put buchu under your arm. Come, my crooked-legged little one, let your mother

sprinkle you with buchu!’

“When she had sprinkled him with buchu, they went and told their friends, and all the

Tortoise nation rejoiced and went and had a great feast off Oubaas Giraffe as he lay

dead in the veld.

“And they thought more of the little Red Tortoise than ever. Even the Young Ones,

who had been angry with him, said, ‘He is wiser than we are. We will listen to what

he says. P’r’aps, after all, there is something in being born a certain colour.’”

Mountain tortoise.

An aromatic veld herb, from which a decoction is made. Sprinkling buchu under the arm is a

Hottentot custom in token of approval.

The Mimosa, which is white when burnt by the sun.

The Ostrich Hunt.

The next day all the time that was not given to lessons and meals was spent by the

little boys in scouring the veld for a red tortoise. Disappointment at their fruitless

search found vent in no measured terms when Outa Karel appeared in the diningroom

at his usual hour.

“Ach, to hear them now!” he said, regarding them with his wide-mouthed smile of

amused tolerance. “Does it then rain red tortoises? And how can the baasjes think

they will find at the first shot a thing that only comes once in a thousand years?”

“Well,” said Willem, stoutly, “it might just have been the time for one. How were we

to know?”

“Outa,” asked little Jan, earnestly, “do you know when it will be red tortoise time


“Aja, baasjes,” said Outa readily, “it won’t be long now. Let Outa think.” He

performed a tattoo on the red kopdoek—a sure sign that he was in the thick of mental

gymnastics. “What comes just before a thousand, my baasjes?”

“Nine hundred and ninety-nine,” answered Pietie, who was good at arithmetic.

“Now, yes,” said Outa, triumphantly, “I knew it must be nearly time. It is nine

hundred and ninety-nine years since there was a red tortoise, so next year this time

baasjes can begin to look for one. Only begin, my baasjes, because it will only be

creeping out of the egg then. And p’r’aps it won’t be in this veld. It might be far, far

away where people don’t know about a red tortoise, and so no one will look for him.

Must Outa tell another story about him?”

The sly old man had taken the best way of escaping more questions. The little boys

gathered round and listened wide-eyed as he told the story of the Tortoises hunting

the Ostriches.

“After Oubaas Giraffe was dead, the Tortoises had a nice life for a long time, and

then there came into their veld Old Three Sticks, the Ostrich, with his mam-ma and

pap-pa, and his wives, and uncles, and aunties, and children, and friends. Alla! there

were a lot of Ostriches! The whole veld was full of them, and they all began eating

tortoises wherever they could find them. It was just the same like when Oubaas

Giraffe used to go about. And the tortoises thought and thought, and they talked and

talked, but they couldn’t make a plan that would drive the Ostriches away.

“The little Red Tortoise was thinking, too, but he didn’t talk till he had his plan ready.

Then he called all the Tortoises together. The Old Ones came because they wanted to

hear what the wise little Red One had to say, and the Young Ones came because ever

since he had killed Oubaas Giraffe they had listened to him. When they were all

together he said, ‘It now goes on too long, this hunting of the Tortoises by Old Three

Sticks and his friends. Let us change places and let us, the Tortoise people, go and

hunt Ostriches.’

“‘Peep! peep!’ cried all the young Tortoises: they were quite ready. But the Old Ones

said, ‘Is this the wise little Red One? How is it possible for us to hunt Ostriches?’

“‘It is possible, because Ostriches never run straight, but always a little in the round,

and a little in the round, so that in the end if they run long enough they come again to

the place they began from. Now yes, on a certain day let us then go into the veld

where the Ostriches like to hunt, and let us make two long rows, not straight out but

always in the round; one ring, very large, outside, and the other, smaller, inside. Then

when Old Three Sticks and his friends come we will call one to the other and drive

them on, and they will flee through the midst of us, round and round and round till

they can flee no longer.’

“‘Peep! peep!’ said the young Tortoises, and the Old Ones joined in. They saw that it

was a good plan, so they all went to the hunting veld of Old Three Sticks and his

friends and spread themselves out, as the little Red Tortoise had said.

“Soon the Ostriches came, pecking, pecking, as they walked.

“The Tortoises sat very still, waiting, my baasjes, just waiting, till the Ostriches were

right in the middle of the two rings. Then the little Red Tortoise gave the signal,

‘Peep! Peep!’ and at once the calling began.

“‘Are you there?’ called the first Tortoise.

“‘I am here,’ said the next, and so it went on all round the circle, one calling to the


“‘What are you doing?’ called the first one.

“Hunting Ostriches,’ said the next, and so it went on all round the circle again, one

calling to the other.

“The Ostriches could see nothing. They could only hear voices calling. They looked

at each other and said, ‘What are these voices? It is surely a great army come to hunt

us. Let us get away.’

“They were very frightened and began to run, and as far as they ran they heard:—

“‘Are you there?’

“‘I am here.’

“‘What are you doing?’

“‘Hunting Ostriches.’

“So it went on, over and over again. The Tortoises never moved, only kept calling

out. And the Ostriches ran faster and faster, all in the round, till at last they were so

tired they couldn’t run any more. First one fell, and then another, and another, and

another, till there were heaps of them lying about, and just where they fell they lay

quite still. They were too tired to move.

“The Ostriches ran faster and faster”

“Then the Tortoises gathered together—they were very many—and they bit Old

Three Sticks and all his family and friends on their long necks and killed them.

“Since then the Tortoises have had peace from the Long-necked People—Oubaas

Giraffe and old Three Sticks. It is only the Things of the Air, like Crows and

Lammervangers, that still hunt them, and baasjes know how they do? They catch a

poor Tortoise in their claws and fly away with him, high up over a kopje, and then

they drop him on the stones—kabloops!—and there he lies with his shell all broken,

and without a shell how can a Tortoise live? And then the Thing of the Air comes and

eats him up, and that is the end of the poor Tortoise. But a Red Tortoise they never

touch. It is his colour, baasjes, that frightens them. So the Young Tortoises were right

when they said, ‘There is something, after all, in being born a certain colour.’

“After the Ostrich hunt, the little Red Tortoise was sprinkled with buchu under both

arms, and his Mam-ma sang him this song:—

The little crook-legged one! I could sprinkle it,

Sprinkle it with buchu under its arms.

The little red crab! The little Wise One!

I sprinkle the buchu under both arms.

For the Long-necks, they that ate us,

It has found a way to kill them;

So we sprinkle it, the little Red One,

Sprinkle the buchu under both arms.”

The usual discussion took place when Outa had finished, and at last Pietie said, “If I

had to be a Tortoise, I’d be a red one.”

“Why, my little master?”

“Because the Crows and Lammervangers don’t catch it. To be swallowed by an

ostrich or stick in a giraffe’s throat would not be so bad, but I’d hate to be broken on

the stones.”

“Ach! my baasje, no matter how Old Friend Death comes, we are never ready for

him. When Outa was young he was nearly killed by a troop of springbucks, and he

thought, ‘No, not toch trampled to death; to be carried down the river is better.’ But

when the flood came and the river carried Outa away, he fought for his life just as

hard as when the springbucks were on him. It was the same when the hut was burnt,

and when the mad bull chased Outa across the veld. Over and over again the same.

Always another sort of death seems better. Always Old Friend Death finds a man not

quite ready for him.”

“And now how would you like him to find you, Outa?” asked Willem with much


A whimsical smile spread over the old man’s face. “Ach! to hear him! Just sitting in

the sun, my baasje, by the skeer-kraal wall, where I have sat for so many, many years.

When he comes I will say, ‘Morning, Old Friend, you have been a long time on the

road—ach! so long, that I am tired of waiting. Let us go at once.’ A person needn’t

pack up for that trek, baasjes. I’ll just drop my old sheepskin kaross, and take Old

Friend Death’s hand and let him show me the way. It is far, my baasjes, far to that

land, and no one ever comes back from it. Then someone else will tell the stories by

the fire: there will be no Outa any more to talk to the little masters.” His voice had

dropped to a musing tone.

“Don’t! Don’t!” cried Pietie in a choked voice.

“Outa, you mustn’t say such things,” said Willem, and they each seized one of Outa’s

crooked hands, while little Jan clung to his old coat as though he would never let it


“I want my Outa,” he cried. “He mustn’t go away. I want my Outa Karel!”

The old man’s eyes glistened with a moisture not often seen in them. “Still! still! my

little baasjes,” he said, stroking first one and then another. “Outa doesn’t want to

make them sad. He is not going yet. He will sit here and tell his foolish stories for

many nights yet.” A caressing smile broke over his grotesque face. “And do they then

want to keep their Outa? Ach! to think of it! The kind little hearts! But what will the

Nooi say if the eyes are juicy? No, Outa only said about the skeer-kraal and sitting in

the sun because it sounds so nice and friendly. Look how lively and well Outa is—

like a young bull-calf!” He pretended playfully to toss them. “That’s right, my

children, now you laugh again. But young bull-calves must also go in the kraal, and

the hut is calling Outa. Night, my baasjes, night, night. Sleep well. To-morrow Outa

will tell them another beautiful story. Ach, the dear little ones! So good to their ugly


Followed by a chorus of “good-nights” from the children; the old man shuffled away,

not knowing that he had spoken with prophetic voice, and that Friend Death would

find him, even as he wished, sitting in the sun by the skeer-kraal.

But that was not yet awhile, and he told many stories before setting out on the Great

Trek for the Unknown Veld whence no traveller returns.

The Green Thing

Checking out at the store, the young cashier suggested to the older woman, that she should bring her own grocery bags because plastic bags weren't good for the ...environment.

The woman apologized and explained, "We didn't have this green thing back in my earlier days." The young clerk responded, "That's our problem today. Your generation did not care enough to save our environment f or future generations."

She was right -- our generation didn't have the green thing in its day.

Back then, we returned milk bottles, soda bottles and beer bottles to the store. The store sent them back to the plant to be washed and sterilized and refilled, so it could use the same bottles over and over. So they really were truly recycled. But we didn't have the green thing back in our day.

Grocery stores bagged our groceries in brown paper bags, that we reused for numerous things, most memorable besides household garbage bags, was the use of brown paper bags as book covers for our schoolbooks. This was to ensure that public property, (the books provided for our use by the school) was not defaced by our scribbling's. Then we were able to personalize our books on the brown paper bags. But too bad we didn't do the green thing back then.

We walked up stairs, because we didn't have an escalator in every store and office building. We walked to the grocery store and didn't climb into a 300-horsepower machine every time we had to go two blocks. But she was right. We didn't have the green thing in our day.

Back then, we washed the baby's diapers because we didn't have the throwaway kind. We dried clothes on a line, not in an energy-gobbling machine burning up 220 volts -- wind and solar power really did dry our clothes back in our early days. Kids got hand-me-down clothes from their brothers or sisters, not always brand-new clothing. But that young lady is right; we didn't have the green thing back in our day.

Back then, we had one TV, or radio, in the house -- not a TV in every room. And the TV had a small screen the size of a handkerchief (remember them?), not a screen the size of the state of Montana.

In the kitchen, we blended and stirred by hand because we didn't have electric machines to do everything for us. When we packaged a fragile item to send in the mail, we used wadded up old newspapers to cushion it, not Styrofoam or plastic bubble wrap.

Back then, we didn't fire up an engine and burn gasoline just to cut the lawn. We used a push mower that ran on human power. We exercised by working so we didn't need to go to a health club to run on treadmills that operate on electricity. But she's right; we didn't have the green thing back then.

We drank from a fountain when we were thirsty instead of using a cup or a plastic bottle every time we had a drink of water. We refilled writing pens with ink instead of buying a new pen, and we replaced the razor blades in a razor instead of throwing away the whole razor just because the blade got dull. But we didn't have the green thing back then.

Back then, people took the streetcar or a bus and kids rode their bikes to school or walked instead of turning their moms into a 24-hour taxi service. We had one electrical outlet in a room, not an entire bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances. And we didn't need a computerized gadget to receive a signal beamed from satellites 23,000 miles out in space in order to find the nearest burger joint.

But isn't it sad the current generation laments how wasteful we old folks were just because we didn't have the green thing back then?

All you ever wanted to know about the 2013 Super rugby season

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Springbok rugby - 2013





Andy Nix Photography

Seeing that photography is my passion I thought it about time to feature a South African photographer in my newsletter. I have been a fan of Andy for some time now and would like to share the link to her blog. She is a great photographer and is fortunate enough to live in the Fairest Cape where great landscapes just beg to be photographed.

Click here to view her blog and while you are there subscribe to her newsletter as well.

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Right click here to download a recipe eBook with chocolate recipes (Chocolate Fantasy)


Some of us were born a little after 1940 , but we can still appreciate the truths..

We Are Survivors (for those born Before 1940. ..)

We were born before television, before penicillin, polio shots, frozen foods, Xerox, contact lenses, videos and the pill. We were before radar, credit cards, split atoms, laser beams and ballpoint pens, before dishwashers, tumble driers, electric blankets, air conditioners, drip-dry clothes ... and before man walked on the moon.

We got married first and then lived together (how quaint can you be?). We thought fast food' was what you ate in Lent, a 'Big Mac' was an oversized raincoat and `crumpet' we had for tea. We existed before house husbands, computer dating and sheltered accommodation was where you waited for a bus.

We were before day care centres, group homes and disposable nappies. We never heard of FM radio, tape decks, artificial hearts, word processors, or young men wearing earrings. For us 'time sharing' meant togetherness, a 'chip' was a piece of wood or fried potato, 'hardware' meant nuts and dolts and 'software' wasn't a word.

Before 1940 ‘Made in Japan' mean junk the term 'making out' referred to how you did in your exams, 'stud' was something that fastened a collar to a shirt and going all the way' meant staying on a double-decker bus to the terminus. In our day, cigarette smoking was fashionable; grass' was mown, ‘coke' was kept in the coalhouse, a ‘joint' was a piece of meat you ate on Sundays and ‘pot' was something you cooked in. 'Rock Music' was a fond mother's lullaby, 'Eldorado' was an ice¬ cream, a gay person' was the life and soul of the party, while 'aids' just meant beauty treatment or help for someone in trouble.

We who were born before 1940 must be a hardy bunch when you think of the way in which the world has changed and the adjustments we have had to make. No wonder there is a generation gap today ... BUT
By the grace of God... we have survived!

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Afrikaans Newsletter

Subscribe to my Afrikaans newsletter . Visit my Afrikaans website. Recipes and freebie with each newsletter.
Smile a While

A woman was at her hairdresser's getting her hair styled for a trip to Rome
with her husband. She mentioned the trip to her hairdresser, who responded:
"Rome? Why would anyone want to go there? It's crowded and dirty. You
are crazy to go there. So, how are you getting there?"
"We are taking Continental" was the reply. "We got a great rate!"
"Continental?" exclaimed the hairdresser. "That's a terrible airline.
Their planes are old, their attendants are ugly, and they are always late.
So where are you staying in Rome?"
"We'll be at this exclusive little place over on the Tiber called Teste".
"Don't go any further. I know the place. People think it is going to be
special but it is really a dump."
"We're going to the Vatican and maybe get to see the Pope."
"That's rich," laughed the hairdresser. "You and a million other people
trying to see him. He'll look the size of an ant."
"Boy, good luck on this lousy trip. You're going to need it."
(( One month later -- the woman is back with the hairdresser, who
asks her about her trip ))
"It was wonderful. Not only were we on time in one of Continental's
new planes, but it was overbooked, and they bumped us up to first
class. The food and wine were superb, and I had a handsome 28 year
old steward who waited on me hand and foot.
And the hotel was great! They just finished a $5 million remodeling
job, and it is a jewel, plus they, too, were overbooked so they gave
us the bridal suite at no extra charge".
"Well", muttered the hairdresser, "that's all fine, but I'm sure you
didn't get to see the Pope."
"Actually, we were quite lucky, because as we toured the Vatican, a
Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder and explained that the Pope
likes to meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind as to step into his
private room and wait, the Pope would personally greet me.
Sure enough, five minutes later the Pope walked through the door and
shook my hand. I knelt down and he spoke a few words to me."
"Oh, really! What'd he say?"
"He said: 'Who screwed up your hair?' "

The French President is sitting in his office when his telephone rings.
'Hallo, Mr. Sarkozy!' a heavily accented voice said. 'This is Paddy down at the Harp Pub in County Clare , Ireland . I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you! We voted to reject the Lisbon treaty!' 'Well, Paddy,' Sarkozy replied, 'This is indeed important news! How big is your army?'
'Right now,' says Paddy, after a moment's calculation, 'there is myself, me Cousin Sean, me next door neighbour Seamus, and the entire darts team from the pub. That makes eleven!'
Sarkozy paused. 'I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 100,000 men in my army waiting to move on my command.'
'Begoora!' says Paddy. 'I'll have to ring you back.'
Sure enough, the next day, Paddy calls again. 'Mr. Sarkozy, the war is still on. We have managed to get us some infantry equipment!'
'And what equipment would that be Paddy?' Sarkozy asks.
'Well, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Murphy's farm tractor.'
Sarkozy sighs amused. 'I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 6,000 tanks and 5,000 armoured personnel carriers. Also, I have increased my army to 150,000 since we last spoke.'
'Saints preserve us!' says Paddy. 'I'll have to get back to you.'
Sure enough, Paddy rings again the next day. 'Mr. Sarkozy, the war is still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We have modified Jackie McLaughlin's ultra-light with a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four boys from the Shamrock Bar have joined us as well!'
Sarkozy was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. 'I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 100 bombers and 200 fighter planes. My military bases are surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I have increased my army to 200,000!'
'Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!' says Paddy, 'I will have to ring you back.'
Sure enough, Paddy calls again the next day. 'Top o' the mornin', Mr. Sarkozy! I am sorry to inform you that we have had to call off the war.'
'Really? I am sorry to hear that,' says Sarkozy. 'Why the sudden change of heart?'
'Well,' says Paddy, 'we had a long chat over a few pints of Guinness and packets of crisps, and we decided there is no fookin' way we can feed 200,000 prisoners .'

Ever walk into a room with some purpose in mind, only to completely forget what that purpose was? Turns out, doors themselves are to blame for these strange memory lapses.
Psychologists at the University of Notre Dame have discovered that passing through a doorway triggers what's known as an event boundary in the mind, separating one set of thoughts and memories from the next. Your brain files away the thoughts you had in the previous room and prepares a blank slate for the new locale.
It's not aging, it's the door!
Whew! Thank goodness !!!

*A man sees a sign outside a house -* *'Talking Dog For Sale .'*
*He rings the bell, the owner appears* a*nd tells him the dog can be viewed in the back garden.*
*The man sees a very nice looking Golden Retriever sitting there.*
*"Do you really talk?" he asks the dog.*
*"Yes," the Retriever replies.*
*After recovering from the shock of hearing the dog talk,* t*he man asks, "So, tell me your story."*
*The dog looks up and says,*
*"Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was quite young.* *I wanted to help the government, so I told the SAS what I could do. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country*, s*itting in rooms with spies and world leaders. Because no one imagined that a dog would be eavesdropping,* *I was one of their most valuable spies for more than eight years."*
*"But all the jetting around really tired me out,*
a*nd I knew I wasn't getting any younger*, s*o I decided to settle down.*"
*"I signed up for a job at Heathrow Airport* t*o do some undercover security work,* w*andering near suspicious
and listening in.*"
*"I uncovered some incredible dealings* a*nd was awarded several medals. *"
*"I got married, had a few puppies, and now I've just retired."*
*The man was amazed. He goes back into the house and asks the owner how much he wants for the dog.*
*"Ten quid," the owner says.
"£10.....!!? But this dog is absolutely amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheaply?"* *says the man.*
*The owner replies "Because he's a lying b*stard, he's never been out of this garden."

Donald Duck and Daisy Duck were spendingthe night together in a hotel room and Donald wanted to have sex with Daisy.
The first thing Daisy asked was, "Do you have a condom?"
Donald frowned and said, "No."
Daisy told Donald that if he didn't get a condom,they could not have sex.
"Maybe they sell them at the front desk," she suggested.
So Donald went down to the lobby and asked the hotel clerk if they had condoms.
"Yes, we do," the clerk said and pulled a box out from under the counter and gave it to Donald.
The clerk asked, "Would you like me to put them on your bill?"
"Thit No!" Donald quacked, "I'll thuffocate!"

Four guys have been going to the same fishing trip for many years.
Two days before the group is to leave, Ron's wife puts her foot down and tells him he isn't going.
Ron's mates are very upset that he can't go, but what can they do.
Two days later the three get to the camping site only to find Ron sitting there with a tent set up,
firewood gathered, and dinner cooking on the fire.
"Shit Ron, how long you been here, and how did you talk your missus into letting you go?"
"Well, I've been here since yesterday. Yesterday evening, I was sitting in my chair and my wife
came up behind me and put her hands over my eyes and said, 'Guess who?'"
I pulled her hands off, and she was wearing a brand new nightie.
She took my hand and pulled me to our bedroom.. The room had candles and rose petals all over.
On the bed she had handcuffs, and ropes! She told me to tie and cuff her to the bed, and I did.
And then she said to my surprise , "Do whatever you want."
So, Here I am...

A single glass at night could mean a peaceful, uninterrupted nights sleep.
NEW Wine for Seniors , I kid you not.....
Clare Valley vintners in South Australia,
which primarily produce
Pinot Blanc, Pinot Noir, and Pinot
Grigio wines,
have developed a new hybrid grape
that acts as an anti-diuretic.
It is expected to reduce the number of trips
older people have to make to the
bathroom during the night.
The new wine will be marketed as

I was out walking with my Grandson. He picked up something off
the ground and started to put it in his mouth. I took the item away
from him and I asked him not to do that.
"Why" my Grandson asked.
"Because it's been on the ground; you don't know where it's been,
it's dirty, and probably has germs," I replied.
At this point, my Grandson looked at me with total admiration
and asked, "Grandma, how do you know all this stuff??
You are so smart."
I was thinking quickly and said to him, "all Grandmas know stuff.
It's on the Grandma Test. You have to know it, or they don't let
you be a Grandma."
We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but he was evidently
pondering this new information.
"Oh....I get it"! he beamed, "so if you don't pass the test,
you have to be the Grandpa".
'Exactly,' I replied with a big smile on my face.

A list of actual announcements that London Tube train drivers have made to their passengers...

1) 'Ladies and Gentlemen, I do apologize for the delay to your service. I know you're all dying to get home, unless, of course, you happen to be married to my ex-wife, in which case you'll want to cross over to the Westbound and go in the opposite direction.'

2) 'Your delay this evening is caused by the line controller suffering from E & B syndrome: not knowing his elbow from his backside. I'll let you know any further information as soon as I'm given any.'

3) 'Do you want the good news first or the bad news? The good news is that last Friday was my birthday and I hit the town and had a great time. The bad news is that there is a points failure somewhere between Mile End and East Ham, which means we probably won't reach our destination.'

4) 'Ladies and gentlemen, we apologize for the delay, but there is a security alert at Victoria station and we are therefore stuck here for the foreseeable future, so let's take our minds off it and pass some time together. All together now.... 'Ten green bottles, hanging on a wall.....'.'

5) 'We are now travelling through Baker Street ... As you can see, Baker Street is closed. It would have been nice if they had actually told me, so I could tell you earlier, but no, they don't think about things like that'.

6) 'Beggars are operating on this train. Please do NOT encourage these professional beggars. If you have any spare change, please give it to a registered charity. Failing that, give it to me.'

7) During an extremely hot rush hour on the Central Line, the driver announced in a West Indian drawl: 'Step right this way for the sauna, ladies and gentleman... unfortunately, towels are not provided.'

8) 'Let the passengers off the train FIRST!' (Pause ) 'Oh go on then, stuff yourselves in like sardines, see if I care - I'm going home....'

9) 'Please allow the doors to close. Try not to confuse this with 'Please hold the doors open.' The two are distinct and separate instructions.'

10) 'Please note that the beeping noise coming from the doors means that the doors are about to close. It does not mean throw yourself or your bags into the doors.'

11) 'We can't move off because some idiot has their hand stuck in the door.'

12) 'To the gentleman wearing the long grey coat trying to get on the second carriage -- what part of 'stand clear of the doors' don't you understand?'

13) 'Please move all baggage away from the doors.' (Pause..) 'Please move ALL belongings away from the doors.' (Pause...) 'This is a personal message to the man in the brown suit wearing glasses at the rear of the train: Put the pie down, Four-eyes, and move your bloody golf clubs away from the door before I come down there and shove them up your a**e sideways!'

14) 'May I remind all passengers that there is strictly no smoking allowed on any part of the Underground. However, if you are smoking a joint, it's only fair that you pass it round the rest of the carriage.'

Some advice

To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine.
And those who don't
and are always
seen with a bottle of water
in their hand.

As Ben Franklin said:
In wine there is wisdom,
In beer there is freedom,
In water there is bacteria.

In a number of carefully controlled trials,
Scientists have demonstrated that if we drink
1 litre of water each day,
At the end of the year we would have absorbed
More than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli,
(E. Coli) - bacteria
Found in faeces.
In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop.

We do NOT run that risk when drinking wine & beer
(or tequila, rum, whiskey or other liquor)
Because alcohol has to go through a purification process
Of boiling, filtering and/or Fermenting.

Water = Poop,
Wine = Health
Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid,
Than to drink water and be full of $hit..

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information:
I'm doing it as a public service


Images - A selection of my photos

White rhino
Taken during our recent trip to Kruger Park. At the rate they are being poached we might only see them on photos in the near future!

Zimbabwe update

For the latest on happenings in Zimbabwe, go to:  and subscribe to their newsletter, a really good source of current information

Cathy Buckle is writing from Zimbabwe, her letter is below.

Dear Family and Friends,
Eyebrows are up, suspicions are high and whispers are spreading about the car crash which led to the recent death of a senior politician in Zimbabwe. The ZANU PF MP for Guruve South, Edward Chindori-Chininga died on the 19th June 2013 when his car hit a tree. The death of the MP came just as Zanu PF began the process of candidate selection for their primary elections.

Rather than suppressing people’s suspicions, the photos of the car and description of the crash location, together with the events of the past week, have opened the flood gates of doubt. MP Chindori-Chininga was the chairman of the parliamentary portfolio committee on mines and energy and had become known as ‘the whistleblower’ for tenaciously tracking and fearlessly exposing the involvement of Zanu PF officials in the Marange diamond mines.

Just a week ago Mr Chindori- Chininga presented a report to parliament in which he wrote of ‘diamond barons’ and disclosed how millions of dollars of diamond royalties had disappeared. According to Mr Chindori-Chininga’s report, one diamond company, Mbada, said it had paid $293 million in taxes over four years but the government said it had only received $82 million. Everyone got busy on their calculators trying to work out how many things could be fixed in our poor, broken down country with the missing 211 million US dollars – and that was just from one of the diamond companies in Marange, what about the rest?

The mysterious death of Mr Chindori Chininga received widespread coverage on internet Facebook pages. Revelations, names, accusations and phone numbers relating to the mysterious car crash were posted on the massively popular Baba Jukwa Facebook page caused a dramatic increase to 167 thousand followers, a jump of over six thousand people in just two days. The meteoric rise of Baba Jukwa is the talk of the country and everywhere people are logging in from homes and offices, laptops, desktops and cellphones to get the latest inside information about the wheeling, dealing and dirty deeds of people in positions of power and responsibility. One contributor describes Baba Jukwa as:
“the national spirit of rebellion that has entered and found comfort in the hearts of all Zimbabweans.”

Joining the Baba Jukwa ‘spirit of rebellion’ in recent weeks have been two satirical, snivelling, secret agents who you love to hate.
They are CIO characters called Nyoka and Kunyepa (Snake and Liar) whose schemes, plots and grovelling phone calls feature on You Tube clips. The latest Nyoka and Kunyepa cartoon caused much mirth when it included Baba Jukwa, showing him taking notes at a cabinet meeting.
That clip attracted over eight thousand views in the first three days of its release.

Strange as it may seem, the cartoon faces of Nyoka, Kunyepa and Baba Jukwa are becoming the identity of election 2013 and as NewsDay newspaper said in an editorial about Baba Jukwa this week: “It will be naïve to ignore what this Facebook character says as we go towards elections.” Who knows, perhaps these three faces will even be on ballot slips in a few months time?

Until next time, thanks for reading.
Love cathy
22nd June 2013. Copyright Cathy Buckle. <>

For information on my new book “IMIRE”, about Norman Travers and Imire Game Park, or my other books about Zimbabwe: “Innocent Victims,” African Tears,” “Beyond Tears;” and “History of the Mukuvisi Woodlands 1910-2010”, or to subscribe/unsubscribe to this letter, please visit my website or contact <>
Mediteranean foods

Mediterranean Diet

The inhabitants of the Mediterranean region have such a low incidence of some of the diseases that plague other Western countries. Diet plays an important role in these statistics.

Southern Spain, the south of France, Italy, Greece, Turkey, the Middle East and North Africa make up the Mediterranean region. They are all well known for their healthy diet and lifestyle. There food is rich in fresh fruit and vegetables, grains, pulses, nuts and fish. They eat very little red meat and other animal fats. The main source of fat is olive oil, used both for cooking and flavouring.

Their mild climate and golden sunshine is perfect for cultivating their most prized ingredients. The azure sea is brimming with a variety of different species of fish and shellfish, very popular ingredients of their cuisine.

Mediterranean food is based on peasant cooking with a respect for individual ingredients and a focus on simplicity. No complicated cooking methods or exotic ingredients are used.

Each country favours their special herbs and spices that lends a unique flavour to traditional dishes.

The relatively low incidence of heart disease, obesity, diabetes and cancer throughout the Mediterranean is a phenomenon that dieticians and nutritionists continue to research. Apart from the healthy diet, the slower pace of live is also a big contributor.

Mediterranean Favourites

While the Mediterranean diet as a whole has obvious health benefits, there are some particular ingredients that make significant contributions to it's good reputation - olive oil, legumes, grains, leafy greens and vegetables, fish, eggs, yoghurt and cheese.

Olive oil:- This is the most commonly used oil in the Mediterranean.It's a versatile oil with four major classes - extra virgin olive oil, virgin olive oil, olive oil and light olive oil - ranging from fruity to very mild. These are used in both cooking and flavouring. This is possible the most significant ingredient in this cuisine. The higher the quality of the oil, the better the flavour. Olive oil is a monounsaturated fat that helps to lower LDL or 'bad' cholesterol in the blood. It also contains anti-oxidants, and is a source or vitamins A, B, C, D, E and K.

Legumes:- Borlotti beans, cannellini beans, chickpeas, lentils and dried broad beans are classic peasant food - an inexpensive source of protein. They are also high in fibre and have a low GI. Dried or canned, they have a wide range of uses in Mediterranean cuisine, from soups and stews to salads.

Grains:- The grains found in these foods are mainly whole grains, which can help reduce the risk of heart disease. Wheat is an important staple, found in various guises, including burghul, a wholegrain form that is used in salads and pilafs, and bread, pasta and couscous made form high-protein durum wheat flour. Significantly, bread is either eaten plain or with olive oil, not butter or margarine. Rice is another mainstay of Mediterranean cooking, and various kinds are used to suit different dishes.

Leafy greens and vegetables:- Filled with a wide variety of vitamins, minerals and phytochemicals the salad greens, herbs and vegetables that feature in the Mediterranean diet are eaten regularly and in large quantities.

Fish:- Fresh from the sparkling blue Mediterranean sea, fish and shellfish make up a significant part of the diet. Fish is a rich source of omega-3 fatty acids, important for heart health and for brain development in children.

Eggs:- Another good-quality protein in the diet, found in breakfast, lunch and dinner dishes.

Yoghurt and cheese:- These are good sources of calcium. Yoghurt plays an important role in Mediterranean cook, particularly in Greece and Turkey. It gives dishes a lovely creamy texture where other cuisines use high-fat cream for the same effect. Most Mediterranean countries have their own speciality cheese - bocconcini, fetta, haloumi, kefalotyri, parmesan, pecorino and provolone are some of the best know.

Mediterranean-style Eating

There are significant health benefits to be gained by switching to a Mediterranean-style diet. Even making small modifications to your current eating habits can make a big difference to your long-term health.

Tips for switching to a Mediterranean-style diet
•Eats lots of fresh seasonal fruit and vegetables.
•Cook with whole grains, and switch to wholegrain bread, rice and pasta.
•Eat fish and seafood at least twice a week, poultry one a week and red meat once a week.
•Choose small, lean portions of red meat.
•Replace meat with legumes as a source of protein.
•Use olive oil or tahini as a spread or dip for bread instead of butter.
•Snack on unsalted nuts, especially almonds, pistachios and walnuts.
•Replace butter with olive oil in your cooking.
•Use garlic as a seasoning - apart from it's lovely flavour and aroma, it is rich in minerals and vitamins.
•Generously season your food with fresh herbs and spices, instead of sat.
•Eat your main meal at lunchtime and have a lighter dinner, such as soup with some crusty bread.
•Enjoy the flavours of simple foods - dress up a simple meal with roasted cherry tomatoes or preserved lemons, capers and homemade condiments, such as pesto and olive tapenade.
•Finish your meals with fresh or dried fruit and nuts.

This South Africa - news headlines

Go to Source:
The all-in-one official guide
and web portal to South Africa.  
Recipe Requests

Looking for a specific South African recipe? Email me and I will do my best to find it for you! 
The Recipes

Roasted Tomato, Capsicum and Chorizo Soup

1 red onion, unpeeled and quartered
2 red capsicums, halved lengthways and seeded
4 roma tomatoes, halved
2 cloves garlic, unpeeled
500ml salt-reduced chicken stock
salt and freshly ground black pepper
400g can red kidney beans, drained and rinsed
100g chorizo, diced
2 tsp balsamic vinegar
4 Tbsp roughly torn fresh basil

1. Preheat the grill to high. Place the onion, capsicums and tomatoes on a large baking tray, cut sides down, with the garlic cloves. Grill the vegetables for about 8 minutes, or until the skins begin to blacken. Allow to cool slightly, then peel the skins from the onion, capsicums and tomatoes. Squeeze the garlic flesh from the skins.

2. Chop half the vegetables into small chunks and place in a saucepan. Blend the remainder of the vegetables in a food processor or blender with the garlic flesh and chicken stock until smooth. Pour into the saucepan with the chopped vegetables and lightly season with salt and pepper.

3. Bring the soup to the boil, stirring occasionally. Add the red kidney beans, chorizo and balsamic vinegar, cover and gently simmer for 2 - 3 minutes. Toss the basil into the soup just before serving. (It will darken if added too soon.)

Mediterranean Chicken with Olives

2 Tbsp olive oil
2 onions, roughly chopped
2 cloves garlic, crushed
1 Tbsp chopped, fresh rosemary
40g chorizo sausage, skinned and diced
2 large red capsicums, seeded and roughly chopped
4 Tbsp sun-dried tomatoes, roughly chopped
400g can chopped tomatoes
3 Tbsp dry white wine
freshly ground black pepper
4 chicken breast fillets
4 Tbsp pitted black or green olives

1. Heat the oil in a large, heavy flameproof casserole dish or deep frying pan. Add the onion, garlic and rosemary and cook gently, stirring frequently, for about 15 minutes, or until soft and golden.

2. Add the chorizo and capsicums and cook over a medium heat, stirring frequently, for a couple of minutes, or until the sausage turns slightly golden.

3. Add the sun-dried tomatoes, canned tomatoes with their juice, and the wine. Season with freshly ground black pepper, then stir well and bring to the simmer.

4. Add the chicken and stir to coat with the sauce. Bring to the boil, then reduce the heat, cover and simmer for 25 - 30 minutes, or until the chicken is tender and the sauce is thick.

5. Just before serving, stir in the olives and cook for just long enough to heat them through.

Chicken Marengo

3 Tbsp olive oil
4 bone-in chicken breast halves, about 1kg in total, halved crosswise
3 Tbsp plain flour
1 red onion, finely chopped
2 cloves garlic, crushed
250g mushrooms, quartered
125ml dry white wine
185g canned chopped tomatoes
2 Tbsp tomato paste
1/2 tsp salt

1. In a large non-stick frying pan, heat 2 Tbsp of the oil over a medium-high heat. Dredge the chicken in the flour, shaking off the excess. Add the chicken to the pan and cook for 5 minutes on each side, or until golden brown. Transfer the chicken to a plate.

2. Add the remaining oil to the pan and heat over a medium heat. Cook the onion and garlic, stirring frequently, for 3 - 4 minutes, or until the onion is soft. Add the mushrooms and cook for 5 minutes, or until the mushrooms are tender but firm.

3. Stir in the wine and bring to the boil. Add the tomatoes, tomato paste and salt and return to the boil. Return the chicken pieces to the pan, cover and simmer, turning occasionally, for 20 minutes, or until the chicken is cooked through. Serve hot.

Salt and Pepper Calamari

Lemon Pepper
finely grated zest of 2 lemons
2 Tbsp black peppercorns
2 tsp coarse sea salt
2 Lebanese cucumbers (small cucumbers)
2 Tbsp rice vinegar
2 tsp caster sugar
1/4 tsp salt
750g calamari tubes
olive oil for cooking

1. To make the lemon pepper, preheat oven to 150°C . Spread the lemon zest on a baking tray and bake for 5 minutes, or until dry but not coloured. Set aside to cool. Using a mortar and pestle or spice grinder, crush the lemon zest, peppercorns and sea salt together until the mixture is evenly ground and combined. Set aside.

2. Thinly slice the cucumbers and place on a paper towel to drain. In a bowl, combine the rice vinegar, sugar and salt, stir until the sugar has dissolved. Toss the cucumber with the vinegar mixture.

3. Cut along 1 side of the calamari tubes and open out flat. Wipe firmly with a paper towel. Using a sharp knife, lightly score the skin with a series of parallel lines on a diagonal, being careful not to cut all the way through. Cut another series of shallow lines at right angles to the first diagonal lines, to make a diamond shape (this makes the calamari curl as it cooks). Cut the calamari into pieces about 5 cm long and toss in a bowl with half the lemon pepper until coated.

4. Heat a large frying pan over a high heat, then oil the pan well. When the oil is hot, cook the calamari in batches, turning once. for 1 - 2 minutes. The calamari is cooked as soon as it turns white.

5. Sprinkle the calamari with the remaining lemon pepper and serve with the cucumber salad.

Sardine and Capsicum Toasts

2 x 105g cans sardines in spring water, drained
2 stalks celery, finely chopped
1 red capsicum, seeded and finely chopped
1 red onion, thinly sliced
3 Tbsp tomato paste
3 Tbsp lime juice
pinch of celery salt
freshly ground black pepper
4 thick slices wholemeal or wholegrain bread
75g watercress leaves

1. Lightly break up the sardines in a bowl with a fork. Add the celery, red capsicum, onion, tomato paste and lime juice to the sardines. Season lightly with celery salt and black pepper.

2. Lightly toast the bread slices on both sides until golden. Divide the watercress leaves among the slices and spoon the sardine mixture on top. Serve immediately.

Tabouleh with Fish in Lemon Dressing

1 cup (180g) burghul
300g white fish fillets
1 small lemon, thinly sliced
2 sprigs parsley
5 black peppercorns
1 cucumber, seeded and diced
4 spring onions, thinly sliced
250g cherry tomatoes, halved
2 Tbsp chopped coriander leaves
2 Tbsp chopped fresh mint
2 Tbsp chopped fresh parsley
mint sprigs to serve

Lemon Dressing

2 Tbsp olive oil
2 Tbsp red wine vinegar
2 Tbsp lemon juice
1 Tbsp grated lemon zest
1 tsp Dijon mustard
1 clove garlic, crushed
salt and freshly ground black pepper

1. Place the burghul in a large heatproof bowl and add 2 cups of boiling water. Stand for 45 minutes, or until the grains are tender and the water has been absorbed.

2. Meanwhile, place the fish fillets in a large pan and add the lemon slices, parsley sprigs and peppercorns. Pour in enough cold water to cover the fish. Bring to the boil, then reduce the heat and simmer, covered, for 5 minutes, or until the fish is opaque and flakes easily.

3. Remove the fish from the liquid and set aside to cool. Use a fork to separate the fish into large flakes.

4. Place the burghul in a serving bowl and add the cucumber, spring onions, tomatoes and chopped herbs. Gently mix the fish, taking care not to break it up.

5. To make the lemon dressing, whisk all the ingredients in a bowl. Pour the dressing over the salad and gently mix to combine.

6. Cover and chill the salad for 1 - 2 hours to allow the flavours to develop. Check the seasoning before serving and garnish with the mint sprigs

Spanish Tortilla

400g new potatoes, scrubbed and cut into thin slices
150g frozen peas (1 cup)
3 Tbsp vegetable oil
1 large onion, halved and thinly sliced
2 large cloves garlic, crushed
6 large eggs
4 Tbsp chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley
freshly ground black pepper
175g lean ham, about 5mm thick, chopped
6 cherry tomatoes, quartered

1. Bring a large saucepan of lightly salted water to the boil. Add the potatoes and peas and return to the boil. Reduce the heat and simmer for 3 minutes, or until the potatoes are beginning to soften. Drain and set aside.

2. Heat 2 Tbsp of the oil in a 25 cm ovenproof frying pan. When the oil is hot, reduce the heat to medium, add the onion and cook for 2 minutes. Add the garlic and cook for 3 minutes, or until the onion is soft but not brown. Add the potatoes and peas and stir for 5 minutes, or until the potatoes are tender. Remove the pan from the heat.

3. In a large bowl, lightly beat the eggs with the parsley and a little pepper, then stir in the ham, tomatoes and the potato, onion and pea mixture.

4. Place the frying pan over a medium heat, add the remaining oil and swirl it around. When the oil is hot, pour the egg mixture, spreading it out evenly. Cook the tortilla for 5 - 7 minutes over a low heat, shaking the pan frequently, until the base is set. Use a spatula to loosen and lift the edges of the tortilla, allowing the uncooked egg mixture to run underneath. Meanwhile, preheat the grill to medium.

5. Place the pan under the grill and cook the tortilla for 5 minutes or until it is golden and set. Pierce the top with a knife to make sure it is cooked through. Slide the tortilla onto a board and cool for 2 minutes. Serve cut into wedges.

Vegetable Moussaka

2 zucchini, sliced
1 eggplant, sliced
300g new potatoes, scrubbed and sliced
2 red capsicums, seeded and cut into thick strips
400g can borlotti beans, drained and rinsed
4 ripe tomatoes, about 500g in total, chopped
3 Tbsp roughly chopped fresh basil
2 Tbsp olive oil
salt and freshly ground black pepper
130g low-fat natural yoghurt
1 egg, lightly beaten
4 Tbsp grated parmesan

1.Preheat the oven to 180°C. Bring a large saucepan of salted water to the boil. Add the zucchini and cook for 2 minutes. Remove from the water with a slotted spoon and drain on paper towel. Add the eggplant slices to the water and cook for 2 minutes, then remove and drain. Add the potato slices to the water and cook for about 8 minutes, or until just tender. Drain and set aside with the other blanched vegetables.

2. Meanwhile heat a cast iron, rigged grill pan over a high heat. Cook the capsicum slices for 5 minutes, turning occasionally, until slightly charred all over and starting to soften. Remove from the pan and roughly chop.

3. Combine all the cooked vegetables with the borlotti beans, chopped tomatoes and basil in a large baking dish. Drizzle with olive oil and season to taste with salt and pepper and stir until well combined.

4. In a bowl, stir together the yoghurt, egg and parmesan until blended. Spread over the top of the vegetables in an even layer (it may not cover the vegetables completely, depending on the shape of the dish). Bake the moussaka for 40 minutes, or until the vegetables are tender and the topping is golden brown.

Pear and Fig Pancakes

310ml skim milk
1 egg
110g plain flour
3 tsp caster sugar
pinch of salt
2 tsp sunflower oil
4 Tbsp low-fat fromage frais or thick Greek yoghurt
4 Tbsp maple syrup (optional)


1 Tbsp butter
750g pears, peeled, cored and chopped
100g dried figs, chopped
1/2 tsp ground cinnamon
pinch of ground cloves
grated zest of 1/2 orange
120g soft brown sugar or Demerara sugar

1. To make the pancake batter, place the milk, egg, flour, sugar and salt in a food processor and blend for 1 minute or until smooth. Alternatively, place the flour, sugar and salt in a bowl, make a well in the centre and pour in the combined egg and milk. Slowly stir with a wooden spoon to incorporate the flour until smooth batter forms. Set the batter aside to rest for 30 minutes.

2. Preheat the oven to 150°C. Grease an 18 cm non-stick frying pan with a little sunflower oil and heat the pan until very hot. Pour in enough batter and tilt the pan so that it covers the base. Cook for about 30 - 45 seconds, or until the underside is golden. Turn the pancake and cook the other side for 1 minute, or until set.

3. Transfer the pancake to a sheet of paper towel. Repeat the process to make 8 pancakes, separating each with a sheet of paper towel. Wrap the stack of pancakes in foil and keep warm in the oven.

4. To make the filling, melt the butter in a small frying pan over a medium heat. Add the pears and the figs, reduce the heat and simmer, covered, for about 10 minutes, or until the pears are tender when tested with a knife. Stir the cinnamon, cloves, orange zest and sugar into the fruit and simmer for 5 minutes.

5. Divide the fruit mixture among the warm pancakes. Fold and serve two pancakes per person. Top with the fromage frais or yoghurt, and maple syrup, if desired.

Pear and Almond Tart

190g plain flour
pinch of salt
75g unsalted butter, diced and chilled


50g unsalted butter
3 Tbsp caster sugar
2 egg yolks
3 Tbsp plain flour
50g ground almonds
415g can pear halves in juice, drained and sliced lengthwise

1. Sift the flour and salt into a large bowl. Add the butter and, using your fingertips, rub it into the flour until the mixture resembles breadcrumbs. Sprinkle with 1 1/2 - 2 Tbsp cold water. Using a round-bladed knife, stir to bind the mixture together. Knead gently on a floured work surface for a few seconds until smooth. Wrap in plastic wrap and chill for 20 minutes before using.

2. Preheat the oven to 190°C and put a baking tray in the oven to heat up. Roll out the pastry on a lightly floured work surface and use it to line a 24 cm loose-based, fluted tart tin. Prick the pastry base all over with a fork, then chill for a further 10 minutes. Line the pastry with baking paper and baking beads or uncooked rice and bake on the hot tray for 10 minutes, or until the pastry is set and pale golden. Remove the paper and beads or rice, then bake for 5 minutes.

3. To make the filling, cream together the butter and sugar in a bowl using a wooden spoon. Beat in the egg yolks, followed by the flour and ground almonds. Spread the almond mixture over the base of the tart. Lay the pear slices over the filling, gently pressing them down.

4. Bake the tart for 25 minutes, or until golden and firm. Remove from the oven, and leave to cool slightly before removing from the tin. Cool completely on a wire rack before serving.


Additional Income

I have joined and it works, it is not a get rich quick scheme but with patience it can build up to a useful extra monthly income, it does require a little bit of marketing as well as a low monthly subscription, but, bottom line, it works.
This company is definitely not a scam. Be Motivated Today provides a motivational service and has great motivational products. The CEO, Arnfried Klein-Werner, is an International Motivational Speaker. He has tried and studied many systems that don't work and after 13 years developed a system that actually does work and is creating
an additional income for many South Africans already. He understands people's fears and therefore offers a 100% money-back guarantee, if you don't make money after 6 months. In other words you have nothing to lose.....
You have nothing to lose. I encourage you to visit the website and register to try the products and service out for free. Click here for more information. Register as a free trial member then upgrade to start your income stream.

I must add that I got just over R900 in commission in February, every little bit helps. It takes some time, but it will happen eventually. Remember to upgrade to start participating in the income stream.

I received this email recently:

Yes, out of curiosity I visited Be Motivated Today during September 2009, but only joined during August 2010, what a waste of time!!!.
If I knew what was happening during the year I wasted, man, I would have joined immediately after I  read the details of the setup.
I now have a waiting list of seven on my downline (one already joined as Silver), the others are bound to join during November and they are jumping around purely from excitement to get started and its rubbing off on me as well.
Just one question: My intention is to place an invitation advertisement on the rear window of my car, do you think it could shake some people out of their dreams and make them joining us?

My Super Duper Recipe CD

I have just added 37 very old digitally scanned (you see the actual pages of the book) recipe books to the CD, at no extra cost. Here is your chance to have a really unique recipe book collection.

I have decided to simplify the way I sell my recipe eBook collection.

I am putting them all on one CD in an English and Afrikaans folder now also a folder with the very old books,  over 130 recipe eBooks in all. That means less than R1 a recipe book, a real bargain! Most of the books come with resale rights so you can sell them individually if you wish.

Pricing: The CD costs  R120 registered postage included (R150 for next day Speed Services delivery in SA). Once I mail the CD I will email you the post office tracking number

Paypal orders also accepted at US$20 per CD overseas postage included. My Paypal email addy is

If you are interested in my Super CD just click here and I will send you my banking details. Remember to include you postal address.

As soon as I mail the CD I will email you the post office tracking number as proof of despatch.

FunkyMunky Traditional South African Recipes - A comprehensive collection of Traditional South African recipes.
Tradisionele Suid Afrikaanse Resepte - Traditional South African Recipes in Afrikaans
Christmas Recipes - A selection of Christmas Recipes for you to try!
101 Camping and Outdoor Recipes - Recipes for you to try next time you go camping
400 Refreshing punch recipes - Some great ideas for liquid refreshment at your next party
Favourite Christmas Cookies - 34 Great cookie recipes for you to enjoy!
Christmas Cookie Recipes - A delicious collection of Christmas Cookie Recipes
A Homemade Christmas - 100 Simple and delicious recipes for your special holiday meals
Holiday Candy and Fudge - 42 Great candy recipes, a hit with kids of all ages!
Kids Fun Recipes - 120 Fun and Delicious Recipes
Delicious Puddings - A Collection of 167 Pudding Recipes
Pumpkin Pie - Pumpkin pies and more!
Salad Recipes - A Collection of Easy to Follow Salad Recipes
Summer Party Cookbook - The name says it all!
Pampercat and Pamperdog - Recipe treats for your feline and canine friends
80 Seasonal Recipes from around the world - A selection of festive recipes from the four corners of the globe!
Crockpot Recipes - In South Africa we would probably call this Potjiekos
International Recipes - A selection of recipes from all over the world
Fish and Game Recipes - A selection of mouthwatering recipes
Lemonade - A large selection of lemonade recipes
Pizzeria - Try some of these great pizza recipes
Casseroles - 17 pages of mouthwatering casserole recipes
Low Fat Recipes - Watching your cholesterol? Then this is for you!
Soup Recipes - Ideal for those cold winter evenings
Chicken Recipes - 300 Delicious Chicken Recipes
Amish Recipes - 65 Tried and True Traditional Amish Recipes
Apple Recipes - Mouth watering apple recipes
Blue Ribbon Recipes - 490 Award Winning Recipes
The Bread Book - The bread and biscuit baker's and sugar boiler's assistant
Chocolate Delights - Deliciously decadent and delightful recipes for the chocaholic in you
Carolina Mountain Cooking - Created from the recipes and memories of two of the Carolina Mountain's most talented cooks.
Egg Recipes - 111 Great Egg Recipes
Great Gifts in a Jar - A personally made gift is usually more appreciated!
Italian Recipes - A collection of 185 delicious Italian dishes
Smoothies - 126 Easy recipes for maximum sports performance
Top Secret Recipes - Top secret famous recipes
Wings - The ultimate chicken wing cookbook
The Barmaster - Essential tips and techniques for bartenders
Be a Grillmaster - How to host the perfect bbq!
101 Good Jam Recipes - Make your own jams, 101 recipes for you to try
Deep Fryer Recipes - 101 Recipes for the Deep Fryer
Frozen Dessert Recipes - From ice cream to yoghurt - 170 pages of mouthwatering recipes.
Recipes from South of the Border - 247 pages of typically Mexican recipes
Various Rice Dishes - 32 Great Rice Dishes
The Appetizer Collection - More than 150 pages of great ideas for appetizers
The Big Book of Cookies - From Almond Bars to Zucchini Bars, they are all here, 233 pages of cookie recipes
Salad Recipes - A Collection of Easy to Follow Salad Recipes
Delicious Diabetic Recipes - A Collection of over 500 yummy recipes.
Cheesecake Recipes - Nearly 100 pages of yummilicious cheesecake recipes!

Bonus eBooks

Something for the gardeners
Organic Secrets - Everything you wanted to know about organic food

Profitable Crafts- Vol 1
Profitable Crafts - Vol 2
Profitable Crafts - Vol 3
Profitable Crafts - Vol 4
20 Vintage Crochet Patterns

Everything you wanted to know about making, marketing and selling your crafts.

Big Fat Lies - A shocking expose of the 12 biggest scams, cover-ups, lies, myths and deceptions
in the diet and weight-loss industries.

10,000 Dreams Interpreted

A List of the very old digitally scanned recipe eBooks.

A Calendar of Dinners with 615 recipes - 1922
A Dozen dainty recipes for preparing wartime canned meats - 1920
A Home Guide - or a book by 500 ladies - 1877
Aunt Carolines Dixieland Recipes - 1922
A Practical Dictionary of Cookery - 1200 tested recipes - 1898
Best recipes for baking - pre 1908
Buckeye Cookery and Practical Housekeeping - 1877
Burke's Complete Cocktail and tasty bite recipes - 1936
Catering for special occasions with menus and recipes - 1911
Diabetic Cookery - recipes and menus - 1917
Fifty Choice Recipes for Spanish and Mexican Dishes - 1905
Fifty valuable and delicious recipes made with corn meal - 1917
Heart of the Wheat - a book of recipes - 1910
Hospitality - recipes and enteertainment hints for all occasions - 1922
Hotel Management - quantity food recipes
Household hints and recipes - 1877
Ice Cream - practical recipes for making ice cream - 1886
Information for everybody - 1859
Jane Hamiltons Recipes - 1909
Just the thing - dainty dishes at small cost - 1899
Larger cookery book of extra recipes - 1891
Leather Manufacture - 1891
Light entertaining - a book of dainty recipes for special occasions - 1910
Mom's Cookbook
On Uncle Sam's Water Wagon - 500 recipes for delicious drinks that can be made at home - 1919
Our candy recipes - 1919
Practical Household Cookery - 1000 recipes - 1891
Preserves and Pickles - 1912
Recipes - dainties, salads and clever hints - 1919
Recipes for the preserving of fruit vegetables and meat - 1908
The Candy Maker's Guide - 1896
The Housekeeper's Friend - 1897
The Hygenic Cookbook - 1881
Tried and Tested Recipes - 1921
Two Hundred and Seventy Five Wartime Recipes - 1918
Two hundred recipes for cooking in casseroles - 1914
Two hundred recipes for making desserts - 1912
War Time Cookery - 1917
Wheatless Recipes - 1918
Wrinkles and Recipes, including farming and household hints - 1877

And here is a list of the recipe eBooks on the Afrikaans CD:

217 Egte Afrikaanse resepte, Aartappels, Beskuitresepte, Afrikaanse Resepteverskeidenheid, Brood resepte, Vul die beskuitblik, 'n Broodjie vir die blik, Blokkieskoek, Burgers Patties Frikadelle, Brood resepte, Drankies, Drinkgoed, Gemmerbier, Groente, Eet jou groente, Hoender resepte, Happies en Poffers, Kaaskoek, Ietsie anders resepte, Kerskoeke, Karavaan resepte, Kleinkoekies, Kinderlekkerte, Koekiedrukker resepte, Koeke, Likeur, Lekkergoed resepte, Nog resepte, McCain resepte, Moedersdag resepte
Mikrogolf resepte, Peterjasie se boek, Pastageregte, Peterjasie se Kersresepte versameling
Peterjasie se eBoek van vernoemde resepte, Poeding, Peterjasie se Tradisionele SA resepte
Resepte met biltong, Resepteverskeidenheid - ook grootmaat, Slaaie, Sommer net resepte, Sop in die pot, Sop resepte, Terte, Sous, Verskeie resepte 1, Souttert & Pannekoek, Vis en hoender, Veelsydige hoender, Vleisgeregte vir Kersdag, Verskeie resepte 2, Warm en koue drankies, Vleisresepte, Wille samies, Wafels en Pannekoeke, Wors en worsies


Annette se Boererate, Boererate en Verbruikerswenke, Hartstigting dieet, Lennons medikasie, Mate en gewigte, Sop dieet, S A Boererate eBoek, Metrieke omskakelingstabel, Werk van die huis

Silversands Online casino

We usually go to Carnival City, our local entertainment complex about twice a month for a movie, a good meal and a flutter at the tables or machines. Most times it is crowded and my favourite machines are taken. Then I came across Silversands online casino. You simply sign up, download some software and you can practice with fun money to your heart's content before you play with the real thing.
Give it a try,   Click Here  .  

Children's Stories on CD
Find it hard to get quality children’s stories? Join the popular Anna Emm Story Club in Afrikaans or English, and start adding to your child’s CD collection at an early age! Collect al 96 original stories (on 48 CDs!) over 2 years, or join for a minimum of 3 months - you decide! Receive 2 new CDs with original children’s stories every month! Anna Emm Productions has already produced more than 500 new children’s stories on CD. Click here to join . Ideal gift for children and grandchildren.

Just another reminder to join the Africam fan page on Facebook. They will be posting photos / videos and other udates and articles on the fan page from now.
join at
Also visit the Africam  website

Biltong in Australia?

It's not only the South African immigrants to Australia who are fond of biltong. More-and-more Australians are finding that biltong made with South African spices is so much tastier than the simple dried-meat product they call jerky. That's created a local market for South African spices, and an opportunity for a Brisbane-based business called Biltongspice.

Biltongspice now supplies a wide range of traditional and new spice products ideal for making biltong, jerky, droewors, boerewors and similar meat products. Their products include the Freddy Hirsch, Meister, Crown National, Aromat and Marina ranges, together with accessories such as biltong machines and biltong cutters. They also carry the top quality Protea biltong and droewors products, and ship locally throughout Australia. See their website


Subscribe / Unsubscribe / Contact

To subscribe to this newsletter and view previous newsletters,  click here, to subscribe to my Afrikaans newsletter, click here. To unsubscribe, click on the appropriate link above and unsubscribe or email me at :


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